Movie Bathrooms

Summertime, and the living is…well, it’s hot. I suppose when the weather first starts warming up, we all get pretty excited to play outside. But after the first couple of weeks it gets really old…and the temperature just gets higher and higher.

At some point we all need to find an indoor escape, but after the long, cooped-up winter season we look for ways to get out of the house. I assume this is the reason why so many good movies come out in the summer. It’s a great way to get out of the heat without having to sit at home watching sit-com reruns.

Everyone has their own movie theater habits. I know a lot of people grab boxes of candy and tubs of popcorn. All I need is the largest cup of my favorite carbonated beverage. There is one major problem with that, and I usually remember it about ¾ of the way through the flick. I have a relatively large bladder. That is to say, I can usually hold liquid longer than most of my friends. Unfortunately, even I can’t withstand a two-hour film and a jumbo Mountain Dew.

Having a healthy (or overactive) bladder wouldn’t be a problem under most circumstances. It’s a great excuse to miss a few minutes of class, or to duck out of a meeting early. When it comes to movie theaters, however, having to pee during the show can ruin the experience, especially when the best action sequences happen near the end, when the urge to pee is strongest.

To combat this problem, movie theaters should have a restroom in the theater itself, so audience members won’t have to go to the lobby. The bathroom would have all the privacy of a typical bathroom. My idea is that the restroom would be completely enclosed, while allowing people to see the movie from inside. I think this could happen in one of two ways. There could be monitors in the bathroom playing the movie along with the big screen in the main theater. This would be kind of like how many sports bars have small monitors in the restrooms to watch sports. The other way restroom users could see the movie is by using some sort of privacy screen. The screen would allow viewers to see out without letting others to see in, possibly similar to tinting on car windows if the light in the restroom is kept dim.

Does anyone know of a theater where this exists? What movies are you looking forward to this summer?

Thick Ply TP

I don’t even know where to begin with this one. It’s just so obvious it someone should have come up with it years ago. Instead of multi-ply toilet paper, someone needs to create toilet paper that is just one ply, but thicker.

Thick ply toilet paper (TPTP) would improve the function of normal toilet paper. With multi-ply TP, the plies often fall apart, making usage difficult. In addition, one thicker ply would probably be more absorbent, and therefore available for a wider range of uses.

In addition, TPTP would do wonders for the environment. Environmentalists often recommend using only one ply toilet paper, but I think we all know why that really is not very practical. Using less toilet paper would help save trees, but normal one ply toilet paper just won’t work. So I’ve come up with the compromise plan, which it so use thick ply toilet paper. One. Thicker. Ply...Perfect.

When you only have one ply, wouldn’t you prefer for that ply to be as thick as it can be?

Now I’m not a paper expert, toilet or otherwise, but I just can’t think of a reason why no has thought of this yet. Someone who could develop this and market it to environmentalists and toilet paper users everywhere would be very successful.




Does this product exist? Can you think of a reason why it shouldn’t? Leave a comment.